Annoying Things to do at School

organize a bunch of people in one class to emit a low humming noise, keeping straight faces.
organize a whole bunch of people to fall off their chairs at the same time.
organize a whole bunch of people to drop their pencils/pens at a preset time.
superglue quarters to [...]

The World’s Funniest Real Ads

Believe it or not, these ads actually found their way into newspapers all over the world:
Braille dictionary for sale. Must see to appreciate.
FOR SALE BY OWNER: Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000.00 or best offer. No longer needed. Got married last weekend. Wife knows everything.
Help wanted, singer for rock band. Must [...]

Real 911 Calls

BELIEVE it or not , These are REAL 911 Calls!
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency? Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner. Dispatcher: Do you have an address? Caller: No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency? Caller: Someone broke into [...]

top 50 childrens book that didnt quite work

1. You are Different and That’s Bad
2. Take a Walk Down the Railroad Tracks with Me
3. Dad’s New Wife ‘Greg’
4. Fun Four-Letter Words to Know and Share
5. Hammers, Screwdrivers and Scissors: An “I-Can-Do-It” Book:
6. A Children’s Guide to Hitchhiking
7. Kathy Was So Bad Her Mommy Stopped Loving Her
8. Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence
9. All [...]

Wisdom from typical people

Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
Lettin’ the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier ‘n putting’ it back in.
If you’re riding’ ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it’s still there.
After eating an entire bull, a mountain [...]

Oh Ted…

After numerous rounds of “We don’t know if Osama is still alive,” Osama himself decided to send Ted Kennedy a note in his own handwriting to let him know he was still in the game.
Kennedy opened the note, which appeared to contain a single line of coded message: 370HSSV-0773H.
Kennedy was baffled, so he E-mailed it [...]

Who is Jack Schitt?

Who is Jack Schitt? The Lineage Revealed.
Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says, “You don’t know Jack Schitt”. Now, You can handle the situation.
Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Knee-deep Schitt, Inc.
In turn, Jack [...]

Peter Kay One Liners

PETER KAY ONE LINERS
I saw a fat person wearing a sweatshirt with ‘Guess’ on it. I said ‘Thyroid problem?’
When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realised that the Lord doesn’t work that way, so I stole one and asked him to forgive me.
I’ve often wanted [...]

Who Died the Worst Death?

Three men stand before St. Peter awaiting admission into Heaven. However, St. Peter has been informed that Heaven will only admit 33% of applicants today. The admissions standard: Who died the worst death? So, St. Peter takes each of the three men aside in turn and asks them about how they died.
First man: “I’d been [...]

Your Helpful Emails…

I just want to thank all of you for your educational email’s over the past year.
Thanks to you, I no longer open a public bathroom door without using a paper towel.
I can’t use the remote in a hotel room because I don’t know what the last person was doing while flipping through the adult movie [...]